And The Winners Are...

Okay, since I have no life and, by extension, no story to tell (at least not today), I’d like to turn the spotlight on some people truly deserving of your incredibly short attention span. These people are the first ever recipients of Blogging’s Major Award. An award thought up by me, designed by me, voted by me, awarded by me, and emailed to the winners by ME. Please don’t feel left out if you weren’t among the nominees. This is only the first annual, or perhaps monthly, Blogging Major Award ceremony.

Before we get to the awards presentation, I’d like to say a bit about this year’s/month’s winners. Tonight’s winners include two Californians, one Floridian, one Washingtonian (state-ian), and one Charlottesvillian. It wasn’t terribly long ago when I became familiar with all of their blogs, and I thought…

Hey. These people have blogs like me. That’s great. I wish them well.

Then upon further perusal, I discovered that these people are more than pretty faces. It became obvious that each of them was an astute wordsmith, and I found myself laughing out loud at many of their entries. And I thought…

They can write and they have comedy chops. That’s great. I wish them well.

Upon further examination, it became painfully obvious to me that each one of them had more depth and intellect than I could ever dream of, capable of weaving a poetic tapestry that my feeble mind could barely imagine, and even had their own blog merchandising, and I thought…

MOTHER F%#KERS!!!

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And so, without further ado, let me present tonight’s winners. Ladies first.

The first Blogging Major Award goes to…

Wistar Watts Murray for “The Blog of Wistar Watts Murray” (applause, applause)
Wistar possesses all of the aforementioned Mother F%#ker qualities. She’s a brilliant writer, hysterically funny, and as an added bonus, she’s totally hot. And lawyered up (represented by the firm of Wistar, Watts, and Murray). So careful with your comments. Do yourself a favor and spend some time on her blog.

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The second Blogging Major Award goes to…

David Simmer II, a.k.a., Dave II for “Blogography” (applause, applause)
Dave and I have a lot in common. We’re both bloggers, graphic designers, good looking, and share a Buddhist spirituality. Except Dave is a better blogger, better designer, better looking, and Buddha likes him better than me. Mother F%#ker.

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The third Blogging Major Award goes to…

Karl Erikson for “Secondhand Tryptophan” (applause, applause)
A California Florida OG, Karl is just one funny Mother F%#ker. If you don’t believe me, read this.

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And this year’s Achievement Award goes to…

ME! for “Buddha On The Road” (applause, applause)
Because this whole thing is my idea, it’s the only blogging award I’ll ever get (fortunately it’s the most prestigious) and I want one.

Congratulations to all the winners! Your award will be arriving in your email in a flimsy crate marked “Fra-gee-ley.” Thank you, and Good Night!

ETA - BTW, if you want a Blogging Major Award for real, click here.